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ingredients bowl this 5 pounds ground round 1 pound ground pork 6 cups breadcrumbs 4 1/2 tablespoons dried oregano 2 Tablespoons fennel, ground bowl this 2 carrots, chopped 3 medium onion, chopped 15 garlic cloves, minced mix this 9 large eggs, beaten to blend 1.5 cup dry red wine 1/8 cup Dijon mustard 1/4 cup stone ground dijon mustard 1/4 cup honey mustard 3/4 cup barbecue sauce a few sprigs of thyme 8 bay leaves 2.5 pounds bacon, cooked no salt 1 teaspoon ground black pepper after 20m in oven preparation Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Place the bacon in a medium sauté pan over medium-low heat. Sauté the bacon for about 5 minutes, or until it has begun to crisp and most of the fat has rendered out. Combine first 8 ingredients in two bowls. Gently mix in the sauce, eggs, and wine.  Using your hands, gently work all of the ingredients into the meat until well combined.  Place one-half of the croutons int...

A duck walks into a bar and he says to the bartender, “Hey Bartender, you got any grapes?” And the Bartender says, “No I don’t have any grapes, this is a bar!”   And the duck says “Okay.”   So he leaves the bar, he walks around the block, he comes back and he says, “Bartender, you got any grapes?” The Bartender says, “ No. I don’t have any grapes.” And the duck says “Okay.”   He leaves the bar, walks around the block again, “Hey Bartender, you got any grapes?” The Bartender says, “Look, if you ask me that again, I’m going to nail you to the wall!” The duck says “Okay,” leaves the bar, comes back, “Hey Bartender, you got any nails?” The Bartender says, “No!” The duck says “Ah… You got any grapes?” -- jennifer egan ,  dinner party ice breaker 115